Life thru a lens

While driving home after dad and I had delivered the cats at the cat-hotel, we heard a song by Sandra Lyng Haugen. She came on third or forth place in last years Norwegian Idol. Listening to her song and the lyrics, made me think.

�That song is really awful, I said to dad.
�Yes it is� he agreed.
�I�m positively sure that I could write better lyrics than that� I went on saying.
�Yes I�m positively sure you could.� He agreed with me once more.

I might not be as bad as I originally thought I was. It�s stupidity to compare myself with Michael Stipe and other great writers. I think I sub-consciously did that. That is like thinking that one kilogram weights the same as ten kilogram; it doesn�t!

But I�m still not sure I got what it takes to be a great writer. I might not be a bad writer, but maybe I mediocre. At least one thing is clear, I see myself as a better writer than Sandra Lyng Haugen.

Well, it�s not a competition to be better than someone else, or someone in particular. What it is about is that I don�t want to feel like crap. I want to feel like this is something I�m good at; at least semi-good at. Hearing that song on the radio yesterday, made me feel good.

I�m not lost in bad words and sentences. There is hope.

And when I think of if, the sentence �If you�re the fork, I�ll be the knife� isn�t as bad as I thought it was. I kind of like it now. I�m not going to get the Nobel Price in Literature for it though, but that wasn�t intention either.

I have a lot on my mind today. There is a lot of things I to tell you about.

A thing I�ve been thinking of lately is that when I get myself a new apartment, I want some of my own pictures up on the wall. I want to enlarge some of my own pictures and hang them up; either in my living room or the bedroom. I have no idea of what pictures that might be. I�ve just been playing with the idea of doing it.

It might be hard to find the pictures I want to hang up, but I�m sure it will be harder to find a new apartment. I�ve seen two apartments in the street I live. They�re the size I want and the right location, but they�re too expensive. Sigh! I wonder how I will make it.

I�m desperately in need of a new apartment. I want it so bad. I think about colours to paint on the wall, how I will arrange my living room, how my new bed will be, what wardrobe I will buy and what pictures to hang on the wall.

I sure will miss the place I got now, I love it deeply, but it will be nice to get something new and bigger as well.

Dad said he will help me out if I need money. That is really sweet of him. He was rather negative about helping me out when mum talked about it during breakfast yesterday morning. This morning mum sent me a text message saying that dad would help me out. He hadn�t been negative, it was just that he didn�t understood / paid any attention to what we were talking about.

Ay � I just remembered something. I dreamt about me and Chantie this morning. She was visiting me in Oslo. I don�t remember exactly what we did, but I know we were talking the streets of Oslo. She met my mum and dad and I was happy to introduce her to them. Something happened and I had to run after mum. I had to talk to her and make her understand something (don�t remember what). When I came back to Chantie, she was mad at me for just leaving her in the streets alone. She didn�t knew where I was or where to go.

Ciao!