Life thru a lens

It�s not the year of the color orange this year. That�s for sure. When I was in Sweden last thursday (Easter trip with Linda, mum and dad and a bunch of other people) I bought myself an orange t-shirt. I had to choose either an orange or a light green. Linda said I looked good in the orange. I bought it since I don�t have anything that is orange in my closet.

When I was in Elverum visiting Bj�rg, I found an orange belt that I bought. Well, it�s not only orange, but mainly that color. Today I tried to find something orangey like a sweater, a shirt or a t-shirt. It wasn�t easy. I looked everywhere and if I saw something orangey it was ugly or not my style. At last I found a cool t-shirt at JC (Jeans & Clothes). I got two t-shirts, one orange and one green, for 200 NOK. That�s a good deal.

I searched all the shoe stores I found downtown for some new cool shoes. I want some that is green, white or brown. I didn�t find anything I liked. Some were ok, but I don�t want ok shoes, I want great and fantastic shoes. I want them to say �WOW� to me when I see them. And I don�t want sneakers; I got too many of them. I want something with a little heal.

As I put away my winter shoes earlier this week, I went through my spring/summer/autumn shoes. I found some shoes I�d forgotten I had. Oh my, Oh my � they were great. Almost looks like golden ballet shoes. They�re really cool. I also realized that I got too many sneakers. 10 pairs to be exactly. I searched for shoes to throw away, but I didn�t find any. It�s hard to throw away something beautiful and valuable as shoes. I have two pairs I don�t know if I�m going to keep, but since I�m not sure I�m definitely not going to throw them away.

In addition to my new t-shirt, I bought myself three new CD�s. Shame on me! I need to stop by all this CD�s. I think we need to add a few more hours to the day, if I�m going to be able to listen to all this music I buy. I buy a CD and listen to it a few times and then I put it away because I buy something else. It�s crazy. I�m crazy. I justify the buying by saying �It was on sale, I got them real cheap�.

I think I�ve fallen in love with Evan Dando and The Lemonheads. Dando is the lead singer in The Lemonheads. I�ve listened a lot to It�s a shame about Ray and some other songs I�ve downloaded. I decided that I was going to buy Evan Dando�s solo album Baby I�m bored. I ended up with that CD + two CD�s by The Lemonheads. You know me, when I can�t decide what to buy I buy it all. I had two CD�s of the Lemonheads and didn�t know witch to choose, so I bought both of them. As I said, I�m crazy.

I will get a problem with storage of the CD�s. I don�t have much space left. It�s going to be a problem soon. I�m not sure how to solve it, but I have to fix it somehow. Maybe I�ll come up with a great plan while listening to Evan Dando and the Lemonheads? That would be great.

It feels nice to sit her, writing in my diary and listen to music. But at the same time I feel like I should be doing something else. I should be out with friends, dancing, drinking, flirting with a boy, see a movie or something in that direction. I know I shouldn�t think like that. As long as I�m happy, that is all that counts. It�s just that I think normal people have a social life, but my social life isn�t normal. It�s very up and down. One week I got plenty of things to do, another weekend I got nothing. I�m sure that other people have it the exact same way as I do. But all the people I relate to has it differently. They all got a rich social life or they got boyfriend and don�t need a rich social life that way.

Deep down, I think I feel a bit lonely on such days like this. But I also love days like this. It�s complicated, I�m complicated. I did meet mum downtown and I meet dad too. So I haven�t been totally alone today. And I�m meeting mum tomorrow in Lillestr�m. We�re going to go eating pizza together; either on Peppe�s Pizza or Dolly Dimpel. After that we�re going to see LSK play against Troms�. It�s the last training match before the National football league starts next week. Dad had two tickets and asked if I wanted to go. Sure, I love football.

But when all the contact I have with other people during the weekend is my parents, I feel lonely and dorky. I guess it�s better to have contact with your parents, than not having contact with anyone at all. And after I had such a wonderful Easter weekend (whole last week), maybe I just have to settle with this kind of weekend. Or should I demand more? I know I can�t get it any different right now. Bah!

Oh, I can�t think straight now. I�m tired and I�m hungry. I didn�t eat much today. Shame on me. Maybe I should eat something now before I go to bed? I think that would be vise. I�m sure I will sleep like a rock this night too. Maybe have a sweet dream? That would be nice. A few weeks ago, I dreamt about a guy I went in my class for three years in junior high that I was in love with. I had a huge crush on him for one and a half year or so. It was a sweet dream, even though we both were blind. But at the same time we weren�t. Just a typical dream, confusing as usual, no sense to it at all.

Have a great night (day for those who are on the other side of the earth) everybody.

Ciao!